What is a Pedophile?

What does one look like? How can we spot one? Some think a typical child molester is a man in a raincoat who hangs around playgrounds trying to lure a child with candy. Not so.

A child molester is anyone who sexually touches a child in a sexual manner. Not all child molesters are pedophiles and not all pedophiles are child molesters. However, according to the Mayo Clinic*, approximately 95% of child sexual abuse incidents are committed by the 88% of child molestation offenders who meet the diagnostic criteria for pedophilia. A pedophile is someone who has a primary or exclusive sexual attraction to prepubescent children of either sex. Not every adult who is attracted to children acts on their attraction. There are pedophilic offenders and there are situational offenders. Some situational causes may include curiosity, stress, marital problems, unavailability of an adult partner, mental or medical conditions and/or being unsociable.

DEFINITION

Pedophilia is a psychosexual disorder in which the fantasy or actual act of engaging in sexual activity with prepubescent children is the preferred or exclusive means of achieving sexual excitement and gratification. It may be directed toward children of the same sex or children of the other sex. Some pedophiles are attracted to both boys and girls. Some are attracted only to children, while others are attracted to adults as well as to children. (Source: http://www.minddisorders.com/ )

Pedophilia is defined by mental health professionals as a mental disorder, but the American legal system defines acting on a pedophilic urge as a criminal act. (Source: http://www.minddisorders.com/ )

More importantly, an individual who has been diagnosed with pedophilia is a person who either has acted on intense sexual urges towards children or who experiences persistent sexual urges and fantasies about children, which in turn cause distress and/or interpersonal difficulty.

The condition of being a pedophile is called “pedophilia” and it covers a wide range of sexual activities which may or may not involve force. Sexual acts may include: exposing themselves; masturbating in front of a child; rubbing, fondling or undressing a child with or without genital contact; touching a child’s genitalia or asking the child to touch another’s genitals; exposing them to pornography; talking or teasing a child in sexual ways, oral sex and penetration.

According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, 4th Ed. Rev., the following criteria must be met to establish a diagnosis of pedophilia:

  • Over a period of at least 6 months, the affected person experiences recurrent, intense and sexually arousing fantasies, sexual urges or actual behaviors involving sexual activity with a prepubescent child.
  • The fantasies, sexual urges or behaviors cause clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational or other important areas of daily functioning.
  • The affected person must be at least age 16 and be at least 5 years older than the child or children who are the objects or targets of attention or sexual activity.

PROFILE OF A PEDOPHILE

Child sex offenders don’t stand out and don’t usually appear scary or weird. A child would not normally become afraid when meeting one. They are often someone the child knows; a neighbor, relative, family friend; or someone in a position of authority; i.e., minister, healthcare worker, teacher, coach, leader of children’s activities. Most pedophiles are males.

Pedophiles come from all social classes and all walks of life. They may be young or old; male or female. Their intelligence varies. Most sex offenders are not psychotic or crazy. Their common feature is an abnormal sexual interest in children, although they may not desire children exclusively. About 50% are married and some are also attracted to other age-appropriate adults.

Many pedophiles begin with fantasizing and progress to “acting out.” Wondering if they can make their fantasies come true in real life, they begin to experiment. Their attempts may meet varied degrees of success. Sexual gratification, with the intoxicating feeling of being powerful and in total control, adds a new high to their disturbed world along with a heightened appetite for more.

HOW THEY ENTICE and ENSNARE

Some volunteer their services to groups serving youth. Often, they relate well to children, easily gaining their trust and friendship and may also befriend their parents. Children have an insatiable need for care and attention and pedophiles use it to abuse them. They are masters at verbal manipulation. Most offences against children are premeditated and it is rare that a pedophilic offender spontaneously molests a child.

GROOMING THEIR TARGETS

When hunting prospective children to abuse, they tend to choose vulnerable children; i.e., those from divorced homes and children who are emotionally needy or unhappy; the quiet ones. They also target children from certain types of families; i.e., single parents, homes where parents are often absent and who are less educated.

First, they usually test the child’s ability to keep secrets and reward them for doing so. They subtly grow closer to the child. They may attempt to change the way the child views his parents; i.e., as infringing on the child’s personal freedom. They may give the child liberties his parents would not approve of; i.e., smoking, drinking, watching pornography. They attempt to create a mental environment where the child sees the pedophile as the person who trusts and cares for him the most. The grooming process may take up to a year.

Doing things his parents would not approve of virtually insures that the victim will not go home and tell, enabling the pedophile to feel safe in acting out his fantasies. This keeps the victim captive to the pedophile’s sick desires, and leads to the initial undressing and fondling attack. Once the child voluntarily engages in oral sex (usually for a bribe), s/he will most likely be in a position where telling is almost impossible. When the child can’t tell without incriminating himself, he often gives up any resistance, his spirit is broken, and he becomes mentally resigned to doing whatever his pedophile friend asks. Some learn to disassociate themselves from the “crazy acts” his pedophile “friend” wants him to do. Some abusers are liars, angry and physically abusive…so that the children are controlled by the anger and the pain of physical abuse. Some photograph the children and may market the photos.

PEDOPHILE’S GENERAL CHARACTERISTICS

  • experience feelings of inferiority, isolation, loneliness, low self-esteem and emotional immaturity.
  • their attraction to children usually began when they were adolescents, but may develop later in life.
  • are impulsive, have difficulty controlling their behavior and resisting their urges.
  • have poor communication skills, lack empathy, maybe socially retarded; have difficulty forming close relationships.
  • feel they are inherently “different” by fate, default or circumstances out of their control and responsibility.
  • maintain a façade or “front” for the world to see; divide the world into me and them.

JUSTIFYING THEIR ACTIONS

They live in a distorted mental world. Most pedophiles view their actions as being totally involuntary–something over which they exercise no control. They cling to this self-serving concept because it allows them to continue their acts and still view themselves as an unwilling participant in the process; something they are forced to endure. By seeing themselves as being victimized, they are able to justify not setting any personal limits on themselves, which allows them to do anything they want without feeling guilty or responsible. They manipulate the facts and use their delusions as permission or justification to do what they want to do. Some distorted reasoning they use:

  • That the behavior is not harmful or is less serious than claimed.
  • That the child was sexually provocative and encouraged/initiated the act
  • That they are being helpful to the child and are contributing to the child’s development
  • That the acts had educational value
  • That they are teaching the child about the “facts of life” or “love”
  • That the child enjoyed the acts or attention

CAUSES

Much research has been done on the cause/s of pedophilia. Many medical theories exist. Some evidence suggests genetic factors may be responsible. Abnormalities in male sexual hormone or the brain chemical serotonin have not been proven as causes. Some believe it is an orientation they were born with. A relatively high number of pedophiles were sexually abused when they were children, but there is no conclusive research that this causes an individual to become a sex offender.

Do people choose to be pedophiles or are they born that way? Are pedophiles “sick” or are they evil? Many Christians define pedophilia as evil. Andrew Vachss wrote: “Sickness is a condition. Evil is a behavior. Evil is always a matter of choice. Evil is not thought; it is conduct. And that conduct is always volitional. And just as evil is always a choice, sickness is always the absence of choice. Sickness happens. Evil is inflicted…sickness should be treated. Evil must be fought…if a person has desires or fantasies about sexually exploiting children, that individual may be sick…But if the individual chooses to act upon those feelings, that conduct is evil. People are not what they think; they are what they do.” (The Difference Between “Sick” and “Evil.” May 2, 1999 Parade Magazine)

TREATMENT

In 2008, the medical opinion is that pedophilia cannot be cured, but there is treatment that can be successful, depending on how cooperative the patient is during therapy. They must admit they have a problem. The treatment available is therapy primarily focused on the prevention of reoccurrence, rather than changing thought patterns and feelings. The goal is for the predator to learn self-control and change his behavior. Pedophilia may also be treated with medications, along with cognitive/behavioral therapy.

RECIDIVISM

Pedophiles have a high rate of recidivism (the frequency of additional sexual crimes committed after being caught). Some treatments are effective in lowering recidivism. The typical child sex offender molests an average of 117 children, most of who do not report the offence. [Source: National Institute of Mental Health, 1988]

*Source: · HALL, MD, RYAN C. W.; AND RICHARD C. W. HALL, MD, PA.. “A Profile of Pedophilia: Definition, Characteristics of Offenders, Recidivism, Treatment Outcomes, and Forensic Issues.” MAYO CLIN PROC 82:457-471 2007. MAYO FOUNDATION FOR MEDICAL EDUCATION AND RESEARCH.

One thought on “What is a Pedophile?

  1. I’m glad you made the distinction between situational and preferential offenders; a lot of people don’t know the difference between them. I’ve done thousands of hours of research on this and have more to share. Here’s more info about them for those interested:

    Chronophilia | preferred age range | prevalence

    Pedophile | attraction to prepubescents 11 and below | 5%
    Hebephile | attraction to adolescents 11-14 | about 16-20%
    Ephebophile | attraction to mid-late adolescents 14-18 | 20% or more
    Teleiophile | attraction to adults

    All of these are real terms. [1]

    Note: percentages only take into account males and are averages based on a combination of studies. [2] [3][4]

    Less than 5% of pedophiles and most of the other chronophiles never engage in sexual contact with pubescents or adolescents. The vast majority of sexual contact by adults with prepubescents is situational (non-pedophile). Attraction is a rare motivator for contact. Additionally, there are very few non-pedophiles who engage in contact. Finally, most contact is statutory in nature, not forced.

    Having any of these chronophilia’s does not necessarily make someone a carnal sex-crazed animal whose sole desire is to seek out sex with people in particular age ranges. They are not akin to boiling pots of water that can overflow at anytime. The popular belief is that these adults are just attracted to younger people because of their ages, but most are attracted to them as people, fall in love with them naturally the same way as ones who fall in love with older people, and never knew they were below the legal age since they met them. Then later in the relationship, sex becomes relevant. In essence, they don’t ‘seek’ them out in the same way that most teliophiles (people attracted to adults) don’t usually seek out other adults. [1]

    More about hebephiles – a lot of these people are only hard-coded to form pair bonds with younger teens right around middle school age. While most would consider it a form of torture to have listen to a 7th grader talk for more than a few minutes but thoroughly enjoy lengthy discussions with other adults – this is the design of people primarily attracted to 18+ YOS. hebephiles, on the other hand, could listen to a 12/13 year old talk for hours on end without getting bored or annoyed. They are endlessly fascinating to them, but older females bore the hell out of them – this is the design of teen attracted adults.

    Their hearts just don’t resonate with older females. They just don’t click with them; it doesn’t feel right. It’s only ever when they are interacting with middle school aged teens that they feel a sense of belonging. It seems this isn’t just about sex as the media and so-called “experts” would have you believe. They are always always exclusively described as ‘others.’ Their drives and motivations are different in nature to our own. It’s always talked about as ‘impulses’ or ‘urges.’ However, they appear to have the exact same feelings of love and affection the rest of us do. They experience love just like anyone else. [1]

    Also, there’s also a big percentage of young people in the age ranges mentioned who are attracted to adults as well, and I wrote an essay with tons of data on this. But it’s on a different computer, so I can’t share it right now.

    Most psychologists recommend against using these terms to denote actual sexual activities between adults and younger people, because most people with one of these primary or exclusive attractions never actually engage in such acts, and those who do often lack chronophilic attractions. Most individuals who fulfill the criteria for pedophilia do not actually engage in sexual contact with children. [5]

    Some personal thoughts:

    While I haven’t done any real experiments with large sample sizes myself proving the validity of these percentages, it’s easy to do a simple and easily reproducible experiment at home. Many women who are 18+ don’t look any different from ones 13-18. Show any straight guy a picture of 10 young teen women, some 18+ and some under those ages all in the same picture without telling them the ages, and ask them if they find them attractive. Most of them do and never think any are under 18. Any guy if they were honest if asked to answer the same question would likely not suspect any are underage either. Guys are appalled by the idea of expressing interest in a 17 YO teen, but the very second she turns 18 they all change their minds. If the maximum age of consent was 16 worldwide I imagine the same would apply (Currently the age of consent is 16 in 31 US states). They would not be interested in the 15 YO, but the very second she turns 16 they would be. Barely legal is one of the most popular porn categories right now, so if the ‘barely legal’ age was 15 there is no doubt it would still be just as popular. The age of consent actually was around 10-12 literally everywhere for all of human history until 1975 and still is many countries without society falling at the seams and any guy complaining about it. If they weren’t attracted to those ages I imagine the age of consent would have been raised long ago.

    There’s a website named 9gag with a picture of two twin adolescents both around the age of 13, one with long straight light-brown hair and another with a small short black braided ponytail in a Taekwondo school posing in a picture with their groins and feet against each other. I would compare it to a double banana split in the air. 90% of the comments on it are are by guys and sexual in nature with thousands of upvotes.

    Just go to 9gag and search for twins; see the first result.

    If these percentages are true, and based on what I have deduced here, everyone is a ‘pedophile and the denial of these attractions could be one of the biggest hypocrisies’ of all time.

    The percentages and deeper inquiry into the romantic nature of these attractions also implies that if only hebephiles are accounted 80 million parents in the US alone have a child whose sexuality, their core fundamental and immutable design, is not only criminalized, but is openly hated at about the same level as Jews in Nazi Germany. Obviously, you don’t have to look far beyond general public discourse and sentiment on this subject to know this. What’s really telling is if someone is only suspected of having digital pictures on their computer, they are dragged out into the street and stoned alive by their neighbors (otherwise normal people) regardless of whether they are guilty or not. And those who really thinks about the degree of hysterical behavior that comes out of just about anyone as soon as this topic is raised, will see that it’s often disproportionate when compared to other social issues or crimes. When a person is charged with mass murder they are innocent until proven guilty. Anyway, if we wanted to be conservative we could cut that 20% in half and say that 50% of them are not seriously affected by modern consent laws, that still leaves 20 million men in the US alone. That’s a lot of people who are being ostracized simply for having attractions.

    I have more on all of this, graphs and books as well. For anyone whose wants to learn more about the prevalence of these attractions and is into watching documentaries I recommend “Are All Men Pedophiles?”

    Citations:

    1. Martijn, F.M., Babchishin K., Seto M. “Sexual Attraction and Falling in Love in Persons with Pedohebephilia” Arch Sex Behav., 49, no. 4 (Feburary 20, 2021): 1305–1318.

    2. Schuster, Filip, (2014) Every fifth boy and man is pedophilic or hebephilic

    3. Hall, G.C.N., Hirschman, R., Oliver, L.L. “Sexual Arousal and Arousability to Pedophilic Stimuli in a Community Sample of Normal Men” Behavior Therapy, 26, no. 4 (March 2, 2006): 681–694.

    4. Stephenson, B. W. (2014, July 29). How many men are paedophiles? BBC News.

    5. Stelzmann, D., Jahnke, S., Kuhle L. F. “Media Coverage of Pedophilia: Benefits and Risks from Healthcare Practitioners’ Point of View” Sexologies, Int J Environ Res Public Health, 17, no. 16 (August 8, 2010): 225.

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